October Weekend

It was so nice to spend time with Best Friend this weekend. We stayed the night out at her grandparents' larger-than-life lake home, because she was house-sitting. One word can sum up our time together: Chill. We ate some delicious food from our fave Mexican place, El Bee's. We watched two movies back to back, without even getting up for a potty break. Both were good in very different ways: Crash & Fever Pitch. We ended the night with a game of pool. Oh, and I can't forget that Best Friend was awesome enough to surprise me with some Maggie Moo's ice cream: cake batter & cookie dough. I hate to admit it, since I'm such a big Cold Stone fan, but Maggie Moo's does have a better cake batter ice cream.

The sun was absolutely gorgeous coming up over the lake. We sat on the dock for awhile enjoying the pretty fall colors and smells.

Of course, the rest of the day we watched football. It was so sad that we had our 2nd loss this season :(

I let her try on my wig, too, so I just have to post a pic of it. (Hope you don't mind, BF.)














At night, I hung out with Awesome Married Couple and their cute little baby. I haven't hung out with them since our September lake party! L asked me, "So, Laura, do you like carving pumpkins?" They are king and queen of hinting. Needless to say, I ended up carving their pumpkin for them, something I didn't mind doing. I felt a little pressured, though, because they just sat there watching me, occasionally giving me tips and telling me, half-jokingly, that I only had one chance to get it right. (They only had one pumpkin.) Fortunately I think it turned out. What do you think?

LoveTheseKids

These are my kids. Well, they're not my kids, but they're definitely my favorite kids. I met them when they were only 3 weeks old and preemies. They were so tiny and beautiful. It was love at first sight.

At the time, I was looking for a job, after being jobless for a couple months due to knee surgery. I was interested in being a nanny, but didn't know where to look.

My friend nannied and said she'd heard of a woman who was pregnant with twins, already had a 3 year old, and wanted some help. She got me the number and I made a call. Debi wasn't actively looking for help, but when she heard I was interested, she told me to come over and meet her children and we could go from there. I ended up spending the day there and was immediately hired on as the "nanny". It was my only job for 7 months. Though I left for a more steady nanny job and eventually went on to other jobs after that, I never stopped coming over to baby-sit the kids.

It's been so wonderful watching them grow and develop their adorable personalities. I was like a proud Mama when I would watch them every day, and I would tell stories to everyone (who didn't really care). Though every stage with them has been fun, I'm really enjoying this age: 3 1/2. They're talking more than ever and I love hearing the things they'll say.

Evan is definitely all-boy, but he has the sweetest personality. Always has. Caroline used to take toys from him and when he'd take them back, she'd cry, and he'd just give them right back to her. He's always been a "sharer" and a "hugger". Whenever he has his little bursts of testosterone and ends up hurting her, he's quick to apologize and give her a hug. Last week, I had to scold him for misbehaving in the restaurant and later on, when I told him I loved him, he just looked up at me with his big brown eyes and said, "I wuv you Woah" (he still can't say a few of his letters yet).

Caroline has always been a princess. When she was only 6 months old, she would see flowers across the room and begin sniffing. She's always been drawn to jewelry and "pretty things". She loves anything that has to do with being feminine. She only refers to her bedroom as her "princess room", though the only princessy-thing about it is that it's pink. She can speak clearly, with the slightest (and cutest) lisp. And she loves to sing. She sings to herself all the time, but especially loves standing on a stool and performing "Twinkle, Twinkle", knowing every word and hitting every note. She has the stronger will of the two, but it's often the silent iron will. Oh, but her will can't touch her big brother's.







They say red hair symbolizes a fire-y personality and when it comes to Ryan, they're right. He's full of fire when it comes to not getting his way. We could be getting along great and all of a sudden he'll be upset with me. He's gotten better over the years, but it still makes for an unpleasant evening when I tell him 'no'. I can't help but laugh when I think of the time he called me a "dirty mudblood". His dad told me later it was a "person of questionable heritage" (from Harry Potter). Ryan and I do have some great memories. He and I used to go to the park and the toy store together a lot, stopping for an occasional ice cream cone. As he gets older, he prefers to keep to himself and play his computer games and build things. I'm always so happy when he wants to show me something or include me in his interests. (He doesn't like pictures, so I had to get one while he was sleeping. Too bad, because he's much cuter when he's awake!)

Kids really put things in perspective. No matter how bad my day or how hard my life may be, when I walk in the door and they're smiling and dancing for me, nothing else seems to matter.

Pepperoni Rolls

Yay! I "slaved" over pepperoni rolls the other night for our potluck today at work. But they were all nearly gone before lunchtime, which means they were a big hit. I've had a few people ask me for the recipe already.

1 pkg. Rhodes frozen dinner rolls
1 jar baby dill pickles
1 jar Grey Poupon Dijon mustard (with flecks)
2 pepperoni logs/sticks

Set rolls on cookie sheet (2 inches apart) and let rise for 2-3 hours. Mince at least half a jar of dill pickles. Cut pepperoni into smaller, skinny sticks.

Preheat oven to 375.

Take each roll and flatten into “mini pizza” (using rolling pin, but don’t make too thin). Spread thin layer of mustard. Sprinkle the pickle relish in the middle and put 4-5 little pepperoni sticks. Fold two ends in and roll up (like a burrito) and pinch together.

Bake for 15 minutes.
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I had some seasoned fried chicken from the potluck and wondered who made it. It was so-so. I wish I hadn't asked, because it only confirmed my fear. It was the one girl (ok, one of two) that grosses me out and we suspect she doesn't wash her hands after using the bathroom. Ugh! I feel gross. Reminds me of Dad's definition of potluck:

You're lucky if you find the pot your wife brought.

I did, however, have some delicious banana pudding. Though it was very good, it still doesn't touch the kind I had in southern Alabama a year ago.

Wiggin' Out!

I meant to write this post days ago when I posted my picture, but I am just now getting around to it. If you haven't already guessed by the subject of my post, the brown hair is not really mine. It is a wig!

I've always wondered what it would be like to be a brunette, but I'm not daring enough to color my hair. Plus, if I wanted my blond back, I would have to either wait a very long time, or really damage my hair by bleaching it. I never considered a wig before because I assumed it was too pricey and would probably look really fake. Last week, a co-worker told me she got hers for only $25 at Mr. Lee's! That settled it. I was going wig shopping.

I took a friend/co-worker with me and tried on 5 or 6 wigs before finding "the one". Let me tell you, we had a lot of laughs! My wig came to a total of $37.44! Of course, for that price, it is not human hair; it's synthetic. The downside to that is that I can't curl it or wash it, but for the price difference, it was worth it.

I put it on in the store and have since worn it every day (6 days) and only taken it off to go to bed. I decided that it's crazy enough that I'm wearing the thing, but how much weirder would it be if I kept switching back and forth between blond and brunette?! Besides, if I didn't wear it consistently, I wouldn't be able to know what it's really like to be brunette.

So far, I've discovered some things I like about the color:
1. It really brings out my eyes. I've always felt like my eyes do not stand out and can look dead.
2. I can get away with more dramatic eyes. Wearing more eye liner doesn't necessarily make me look more made-up. It's complimented by the dark hair color.
3. I can wear certain lip colors that I couldn't with blond hair. I've not worn much lipstick lately, but I have a few colors that I love that just didn't look good with blond hair.
4. It makes me look older. This is something I won't want in a matter of a few years I'm sure, but it's nice for a change. I've always looked quite a bit younger than I am.
5. It looks better when wearing certain colors.

What I like about wearing a wig:
1. It's quick and easy.
2. I know I can take it off whenever I want to.
3. It's fun!

What I don't like about wearing a wig:
1. It itches! After awhile, my head gets numb to the feeling of having all my hair secured to my head with a ponytail holder, barette, bobby pins, and a little cap. . . but it does itch - sometimes more than others.
2. I have to be careful that my blond doesn't peek out on the sides of my face. Not something that you really want to have to worry about. I've bobby-pinned some strands that seems to take care of the problem, but occasionally I'll play with it and begin to see some blond showing through.
3. It's not very versatile. Right now I have the top pulled back which looks best and most natural, but it would be fun to be able to pull it all up or curl it.
4. I feel like I have to tell everyone it's a wig. The vast majority of people have thought it was real, because it is the same length as my actual hair (a little shorter actually). But I would feel like I was deceiving people if I didn't admit it was fake.

For the most part, I've gotten compliments and positive responses, though there have been a number of people that prefer my blond hair (me being one of them, though I like the brown). My grandmother is my biggest critic. She hates it and has told me so at least 20 times (that is no exaggeration). She then apologizes for telling me it looks terrible and asks me to take it off so she doesn't have to apologize anymore. . . . I think I'll take the criticism and keep wearing it for awhile.

Wholesome Table Conversation

Looking out the dining room window at one cat stalking another.

Mom: "Well, are they going to fight or have sex?"

Dad: "Looks like they're mating."

Mom: "But he looks like he's about to pounce."

Dad: "That's the idea."

What do you think??

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

This little guy is my nephew. I met him less than a year ago. In fact, I met his mom a little less than a year ago . . and in a whirlwind of a matter of months, I had a sister-in-law and a nephew.

It was all so strange. My little brother is only 21 and here he is a husband and a dad to this little boy. He's been the only daddy this kid has known. My brother plans on adopting him. It's so sweet to watch them together. Aaron is such a good dad, and Micah loves him like crazy.

He also loves my dad like crazy. "PapaPapaPapaPapa." He reaches out to my mom and my sister, too. But, me . . . he's not so sure about me. One day he likes me . . the next day he'd rather ignore me. One day he'll give me a kiss, the next day he's not interested. He sure doesn't seem to be this fickle with everyone else.

And this picture . . it took me about 25 shots to get this. He kept looking away on purpose. He gets this little grin on his face like he takes pleasure in making me work for his affection. There's another little grin he gets when he's fighting so hard not to smile at me and give me the satisfaction. Before the smile breaks, he'll just stare at me as if he doesn't find me the least bit amusing. And I do try too hard. I'm like a clown out of costume with this kid. It's exhausting.

I'm hopeful that one day he'll love me . . every day.

LoveMakeup

I have a little obsession with make-up. It's been so unorganized since I've moved home a few months ago. I had an excuse to get organized when I got it all out to do Alyssa's make-up for prom. Here it is (minus my many many lipsticks and glosses). As you can see, I've gotten quite a few freebies from Clinique - gotta love those. And working at the Lauder counter didn't hurt either.
Here's what I can't live without:
Estee Lauder Idealist
Estee Lauder Illuminator
Estee Lauder Go Wink (which they are discontinuing, but Mary Kay has something very similar and almost easier to use).
Benefit's Hoola bronzing powder (a little goes a long way)
Estee Lauder Illusionist mascara
Favorite everyday lipstick: Clinique Bamboo Pink.
It's all just too much fun!
Share your favorites . . . .

True Story

Her phone rang.

She smiled. It was her husband.

"I'm not gonna answer that," she thought. "I know he's just calling to tell me to hurry up." She grabbed a sweatshirt and quickly pulled it over her head. It didn't match her sweatpants or flip flops, but who cared, she was only running out for a second.

Her husband was headed to work and she was parked behind him. Every once in awhile one of them would leave before the other and a car would have to be moved. She grabbed her keys off the dresser and headed for the back door. Should I shut it, she wondered. Nah, I'll be right back, she thought.

It was still raining outside. The sky was cloudy and even darker than usual for this time of the morning. She ducked her head as if to brace herself for the cold, rainy, Fall weather, and hurried outside. She smiled and waved good-bye to her husband as she ran past his truck and jumped into her car. In just a minute, she had backed out and pulled back into the drive. She wished she didn't have to go to work herself in just an hour or so. She'd rather stay in on such a dreary day. . maybe clean the house.

She loved the house. A couple of rooms had been newly re-modeled and she had decorated well. It felt warm and cozy inside, and it had character. But, she knew they wouldn't live there forever. It was in what she called a "pocketed" area. Most of the homes were built in the 30s or 40s, many of them with big screened-in front porches. The homes near hers were well-kept up, but home maintenance could vary from block to block, as could the type of neighbors. The streets were not well-lit, either. Overall, she had never felt completely safe there.

As she ran around the back of the house and opened the screen door, she immediately noticed muddy shoeprints going up the two steps into the kitchen. She froze. Immediately she thought of her husband. She had just washed the floors last night. Could he have somehow come back inside? But she had seen him drive away. Plus, he knew better than to track mud in the house. This didn't make sense. Her heart began to beat faster. She slowly walked up the stairs and through the kitchen looking to see where the footprints led. Her chest tightened as they went into the main room, turned into the hallway and went straight into the spare room. As she stood in the main room, peeking into the spare, she saw the closet door . . cracked. And she knew. There was a stranger in her house.

A chill went up her spine as she fought back tears. She felt panicked. Her mind began to race. She had to call her husband. She still wanted desperately to believe he'd tracked the mud in, he'd gone to get something from the closet, and she was alone in the house. But her phone was down the hall in their bedroom. Should she run out without it? Did she dare to run down the hall and back and risk facing the intruder? She did.

She bolted down the hall, grabbed her phone from her dresser, and ran as fast as she could to the back door. Her husband was already on the other end.

"Did you come back in the house and get something from the spare bedroom closet?"

"What?"

Her voice was shaking. "Did you come back into the house and get something from the spare room closet?"

"Nooo-"

"-There's someone in the house." And in an instant, she was back in her car and pulling out of the drive. She sped off and headed straight for her brother and sister-in-law's house. Tears began streaming down her face the moment she stepped inside.

Within the next hour, the police were at her home searching the premises, looking for evidence, checking for fingerprints. Since she'd left, the footprints had gone down the hall, entered her bedroom, turned around (apparently after not finding anything of interest), and disappeared. The police called the incident a burglary, though nothing appeared missing.

She and her husband spent the day crying, so happy they, especially she, was safe. What if it hadn't rained? What if the intruder hadn't tracked mud into the house? They prayed together and thanked God for protecting her.

Her husband removed his Smith & Wesson from its case and decided to carry it with him for an indefinite period of time. That afternoon, they drove to the humane society and picked out a 6-month old bloodhound and called to arrange for a security system to be installed in their home. Their lives really will never quite be the same again. They will always be more aware of their surroundings. She will never walk to her car in the dark alone. They will always think someone could be watching.
____________________________________________________________
I'm so thankful that my friend is safe. I know the Lord protected her and I am grateful! We walked around in her backyard today and there were no muddy areas. Praise God that his shoes were somehow muddy! It was just creepy to think some guy was back there watching in the dark, in the rain, inside their fence. To think he may have planned it. He may have known their schedule. It's really a wake-up call. I know I need to be more cautious even though I live in a safe, nice neighborhood.

Just thought I would write out my friend's story and tell you all to be cautious and never think it couldn't happen to you.

It's Game Day

Look . . Twins!

Now we not only have the same iPod, we have the same laptop, too! I'm really not trying to copy Best Friend, but, what can I say, she likes cool stuff and she always gets it first. And just as I had decided which camera I wanted, she got that, too! Shoot!
Here we are having a CD swap night where we imported each other's favorite CDs, (while watching the O.C. . . . I will not get hooked, I will not get hooked).
After that, we went to a bar/grill in my town to hear the Chris Saub Duo and play some pool. I ran into some guys I knew from high school, which is always fun because I like seeing what other people are up to, which this time happened to be "working for my dad's construction company" and "working for his dad's construction company" and a job where "I pretty much do this [hang out] without the beer".

Fun night, and thanks to Best Friend for coming out to my neighborhood this time ;)

"the very hairs of your head are numbered"

And the number of the very hairs of my head is a lot less than it was two days ago. If you have thick hair and haven't had your hair thinned before, it can be amazingly beneficial. It not only takes less times to dry and is easier to wash, but it can give you a much more attractive 'do' and contributes to making your locks more manageable. I used to be afraid to give Cousin Joy the 'go ahead' because my thick blond hair was like a trademark of sorts. I had gotten so many compliments over the years not only for the nice natural "blondness", but also for the thickness of my hair. My old hairdresser said I had the best hair ever. I mean, he was the best in town, and he never thinned my hair. But, Joy likes trying new things on my hair without telling me until after the fact, so several months ago, she went ahead and thinned it. The result was fabulous! I could actually "toss" my hair! I could run my fingers through it! I could blow dry it in under an hour (yes, that's an overexaggeration). It just lay on my shoulders so much more nicely. So, after several months of letting my hair grow even longer, it was time to thin again. This time, the change feels so much more dramatic than before and I'm kinda freaking out about it. I really liked having a nice thick ponytail. But I'm looking forward to perhaps styling it more often, which translates into at all, since I can't remember the last time I did anything but let it air-dry wavy or pull it up. So, all that to say, I'm a big fan of thinning shears (when used by a professional) - just remember to thin within reason to avoid shock.

1,061 . . 1,062 . . . .

As of last night, I now have over 1,000 songs on my iPod. 1,062 to be exact, after last night's addition of some old Mariah hits, Frank Sinatra CDs, Faith Hill, and a few CCR classics. It's taken me about a month to reach this point and though it's very easy and quick to import and upload songs, I don't even want to know how many hours I've spent doing it. My free time has really only consisted of spending quality time with my laptop and iPod. This, however, does include running while listening to the iPod, which feels much more productive than sitting while listening to the iPod. It's so fun not knowing which song will play next. It also means that I don't have to listen to myself pant loudly which causes me to think about how much I hate running and I want to die. Listening to music means I can run until I get to the point where I think about how much I love running and how I could just run forever. The other night I began my jog to "Broken Wings" (the Tupac remix) and did my cool-down stretches to "Trip Through Your Wires" by U2. I'm loving the variety and randomness! I thought I would only enjoy jogging to upbeat music, but I've found that even slow songs and worship music can pump me up just as much. It dawned on me the other week that running in the dark while listening to loud music was probably not very conducive to looking out for my own safety. I feel pretty safe where I live, but I often jog through blocks that aren't well-lit and, though they're not bad parts of town, they're not exactly "inviting". I began carrying my Mace spray last week, which makes me feel better, though I know I still wouldn't be able to hear anyone if they were to sneak up on me. Scary thought. But, today I felt the cold weather blowing in. Unlike yesterday with temps reaching 90, today they, instead, dropped into the 50s! I think I might cry! Not only does this mean outdoor running is about to end, it means I have to wear socks and closed-toe shoes, take my boxed up sweaters out and probably to the dry cleaner's since they're a bit wrinkled, and scrape the frost off my windshield every morning. *Sigh* Fall has officially arrived.

"It's a beautiful day here in Lincoln . . "

The guy on sports radio was right. It was a beautiful day, around 80 degrees with a nice breeze. But what made it even more beautiful was our win against ISU (#23), the first Big XII Team we've played this year. We won in the 2nd OT. What a game! Our offense finally showed up. So we are now 4-0 and remain undefeated at home against ISU (since '77)! Above, me & Micki had to get a picture with this guy! What a great paint job. He was eating up the attention, walking around the entire stadium. I love crazy fans!

LoveReunions

Melissa (from Chattanooga) was in town
for a wedding last weekend. It was so fun
to see her and hang out again. She used to
live two doors down in our apartment
complex and she was like the 4th roomie.
While she was back, we hit up the mall,
the famous Henry Doorly Zoo, and the
new outdoor shopping center she hadn't
seen. Oh, and how could I forget - Red
Robin, where we ate at least once a week
when she lived here. It was fun to have
her back for a few days and reminisce
about football Saturdays, reality TV,
snow storms, trips to Target, and lots
of other random memories.

Beautiful

Things like this shouldn't happen to young girls. They shouldn't happen to anyone. It's one thing to even hear of what happened or what was lost. But then to hear their feelings, their thoughts, and to hear how it's affected them. I was just speechless. I wanted to say something to make them feel better, do something to fix it. I can't heal their hearts, but God can! He's grieved as He's seen what happened. And He is the only One who really understands. And if they'll surrender their lives to Him, He will delight in healing the pain and giving them grace to forgive and a new beginning, no longer victimized or affected by their past. Free. Now that is beautiful.

John 10:10
The thief [Satan] comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I [Jesus] have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."


"Your heart was torn; forgiveness was born
Yet through Your pain, You call us by name
That we would be free, yes free indeed
Free to run with You, to be all that You created us to be
In You, it is true, that we are free (oh Lord we are free)

"Oh we've come to declare the beauty of the Lord
To declare the beauty of the Lord
Oh we've come to declare the beauty of the Lord
To declare the beauty of the Lord"

- Christy & Nathan Nockels

Detour in December

Last December, Best Friend & I took a little detour through Oregon on our way home from Kansas City. Oregon, Missouri, that is.

Psalm 144:2
"He is my loving God
and my fortress,
my stronghold,
and my deliverer,
my shield in whom I take refuge . . "

Sweet Running

At Fresh Start the other night, I gave the girls an example of "processing an issue of the heart" by using one from my past. Sharing my experience with them was good in that it reminded me of all the Lord had done in my heart. A miracle. He is my healer. He is everything.

As I went for a run that night, I thought,

"Lord, these past couple of years have been bittersweet. And all the sweet . . . that was You."

*smile*

And this is why I can keep on running. I can keep on smiling. I used to run, years ago, out of my own strength. It was my outlet. I didn't really believe He could/would heal my heart. Once I let Him, He so proved me wrong. Now I run because of His strength that He has given me. A new, bridled (guided, purposeful) strength.

"Come what may, I want to run" - II Samuel 18:23

Today's M-ism

"Hi, Heth!"

(Our manager's name is Heather. M & Heather are not friends.)

You're Not the Boss of Me

If my legs could talk, I'm pretty sure this is what they would've said last night:

"We remember the 5-mile run last week and no way is that happening again."

Good thing I'm the boss.

Today's M-ism

Remember M? The gal I work with? I've decided she's too funny to not write more about. So, here's the first M-ism:

"I'm pretty sure that the dead black squirrel I saw was actually the 9th black squirrel I saw this morning."

24 Hours of Joy

My cousin, Joy, that is. She's hilarious. She's random, impulsive, fun, funny, often loud, and blatantly honest. Some say she's ditzy, but she's far from dumb. Her high-pitched voice and laugh make her . . . distinctive. And she's beautiful :)

Here's a recap of our weekend together>

Saturday:

2 p.m. : Shopping @ the Mall. Joy is usually the one to randomly decide she wants an outfit and blow all of her money on a shopping spree. I prefer to shop and shop and find the sales.

3 p.m. : I pay full price for a belt and shirt. Joy pays $10 for cropped trouser pants.

4 p.m. : Joy's friend meets up with us. Her home has just burnt down and she has lost everything. Joy buys her a very expensive pair of jeans and a shirt. How sweet.

5 p.m. : Joy & I run to Wal-Mart so I can pick up a birthday gift for my nephew. Joy disappears and comes back with sugar on her face. She's just eaten two doughnuts. Then she forgets to pay for them when she checks out. Easy to forget to pay for something you've already eaten.

6 p.m. : Micah's 2nd birthday party. Joy & I enjoy food and try to decide what to do that night.

7 p.m. : T calls and invites us to his party.

10 p.m. : We arrive at T's house and play polish horseshoes. We are awesome!

11 p.m. : We become the life of the party. We bring in Joy's techno CD and do a "dance" and sing for everyone. Several guys get into it; everyone else just laughs and watches - and we play the song 3 times over. It's hilarious!

12:30 p.m. : We drive home, so not tired or ready for bed yet.

1:00 a.m. : We stop at Taco John's and go through the drive-thru twice. We immediately regret it and drive to the nearest facility.

2:30 a.m. : We reluctantly go to bed for lack of something else to do.

3:30 a.m. : Joy is on my side of the bed. I try to be nice and fall back asleep.

4:30 a.m. : Joy is still on my side of the bed. There is room for another person on the other side of her. I nicely shove her to the other side.

Sunday:

11:30 a.m. : We go to church together.

1:00 p.m. : Joy tries to bribe the hostess at Mimi's to seat us faster by offering her $5. Nice try, Joy. "I used to do that for other people," she says of her days as a hostess.

3:00 p.m. : We lay out at the lake and get no sun, because, who are we kidding - it's September.

5:30 p.m. : We go inside and Joy pulls out brownie mix and cake mix. We make both. And order a pizza.

6:30 p.m. : Brownies are gross. Joy eats five anyway. We toss the rest. Cake is delicious. Pizza still hasn't arrived. Joy has called and chatted with the manager twice about the late pizza. She has decided to give the delivery guy some cake and asks the guy on the phone if he wants a piece, too. "Ask your manager, Kevin, if he wants a piece." Kevin wants a piece.

7:00 p.m. : Pizza arrives. Delivery guy is flustered by the cake. "This one is for you, and here's one for the guy with the deep voice and one for your manager, Kevin." Delivery guy starts to walk off without the money. We give him the money. He starts to walk off without giving us change. Joy says, "Hey, we're not tipping you that much. Kevin said we could have the pizza for free. Keep the ten for yourself." Kevin never said we could have it for free. But, we should have, because it was late and cold.

8:00 p.m. : Grandma comes home and we present the cake to her, even though we know she's starting her diet tomorrow. She doesn't seem to mind.

9:00 p.m. : Joy heads home. It's been fun.


(The picture is Joy doing the "dance" to "What Was Her Name?")

This world is full of colorful people

Ahh, co-workers. You gotta love 'em. I happen to have a few personal favorites here in the office. Let me share. However, I will not mention anything about my superiors, because, if you read www.dooce.com, you'll see that it can actually result in job loss, which wouldn't be all bad, I suppose, but who am I kidding, I need this job and want to eventually leave on my own accord. Also, I am definitely not going to be using actual first names, even though I will not be stating anything negative or derogotory about my co-workers, because although they may be quirky, I enjoy them.

First, let's start with Liz (short for Elizabeth, short for Elizabethan, because she likes RenaissanceFaires) and yesterday she came in, back from a long weekend at the Faire (not Fair, mind you) with a loud, jingly, gypsy-like anklet and hair still up in braids. Hair (very thick, long hair) that, after much subtle hinting from me - actually, it was pretty blatant - she refused to cut into layers, because it would prevent her from putting it up in said braids. After sighing and choosing to "give up the fight", I had to remind myself that there are many things in this world that are more sad than someone refusing to style their hair in a more flattering way. For example: overgrown eyebrows. . . . mis-matched foundation . . . . and, of course, high-water pants - none of which has she fallen victim to.

Another thing that sets Liz apart are her frequent outbursts of frustration. She basically says what the rest of us think. Only, there is a reason we don't say it out loud all the time! Even though I like Liz, I'm allowed to be honest. I think anyone would agree that if one is on the phone and one's co-worker is in the background making comments such as "STU-pid MOR-on" and "Are you FREAKIN kidding me?", it doesn't present, say, a professional image, of one's company. But, even though it may not be proper etiquette . . . I understand. Because when you work for a fast-growing company that has many clients - wait, I take that back - When you work anywhere you're bound to become frustrated with the way someone else does or doesn't do their job. Am I right?

Next, we have M (which isn't short for anything; I just don't feel creative enough to think of a fake name). She has to be my favorite, though. She is always happy and purposely makes ditzy comments that make some people laugh and others roll their eyes. I say purposely, because I can see the look in her eyes when she does it and she knows exactly what she's doing. She also tries extra hard to be nice to managers, etc, and is constantly popping in their offices to say hi or sending them friendly IMs. But no one feels threatened by this, because she is just genuinely that friendly. She's not trying to accomplish anything by being that nice - it's just who she is. She calls us all names like "You little skunk" and "darlin" and she compliments people all the time. The other day she exclaimed, with much joy in her voice,

"Oh my gosh, I just love my job. Don't you love your job, Laura?"

Me: "I don't know if I'd go straight to love".

M: "But you really really like it, right?"

Me: "Sure, I like it. I'm just not used to sitting in one place for 8 hours."

M: "Oh, well I love it!"

And, she does. Do you wanna know how I know? Because she decorates her space. If you decorate your space, usually that means that you're pretty content in your space. My space is not decorated. I have 4 pictures (only one framed) that lean against my computer, two deflated balloons from my birthday last month, and contact solution for when my eyes dry out from staring at my screen all day long. M has a calendar, pictures, multi-colored sticky notes, some little crocheted thing her niece made her, and tons of "supplies" in her drawers, such as 4 different kinds of gum, lotions, snacks, mints, candy, and it's all in organized little cubbies. It's really quite nice, because she likes to share.

M also asks me random questions, like,
"Laura, would you ever wear hiking boots with a long skirt?"

Me: "Maybe if I was alone in the mountains and I knew no one would see me."

M: "Shoot."

This, everyone, is just some of the randomness and "flava" my co-workers bring to my otherwise boring work week. Like I said before, you gotta love 'em.

Do your body a favor . . Think Happy Thoughts

I never realized the impact of stress on the body until yesterday. Everything was going along just fine at work. And then, for some reason, (don't ask why), I took a trip to Negativetown. I began thinking about things that were upsetting and focusing on things that were untrue about myself. I could feel my back getting tight as the tension slowly crept up into my neck and eventually resulted in a terrible headache. I spent the rest of the night feeling dizzy and trying to crack every joint in my body over and over hoping to release some of the pressure. I've experienced tension from stress before, usually after a tough day at work (and I realize that I don't really even know what tough is), but never has it come on in such a short period of time. It was crazy. I tried to think of some way to shake my bad attitude and loosen up a little. Funny, the mall just didn't seem to do it. I hadn't been for nearly a month (excuse me while I pat myself on the back), but I've noticed since having my "real" job these last 5 months that my closet is lacking (usually those last four words should never be said in reference to my closet) some more tailored, work/business appropriate clothing. Nevermind that dress code is business casual and I've probably only worn the same thing 3 times max. I'd say at least a few days a month we have important clients drop by and the dress code is business professional - and those few days are what I must be prepared for . . as well as the next job I have, which hopefully isn't too far into the seemingly distant future. So I went to the Gap - the one place I can always shop even when I don't feel like shopping. And I walked out empty-handed . . . . so I turned around and went back for my big bag full of two tailored, cuffed, button shirts and a black blazer I've been wanting for months. (You thought I actually left without buying something?!-never)

Last night I had my first meeting with my small group of teen girls at what is called Fresh Start. I have not actually been through it (the class & small group) myself before, but the Lord has used the principles and tools taught at Fresh Start in my life in a huge way. So many people are becoming whole and learning how process the issues of their heart and have right relationships with one another. It's so awesome. I can't wait to see what He will do in these girls' lives. And it's especially neat that they are so young and learning biblical principles that they can apply to so many of life's situations. Another perk about them being young . . we get candy every week!

After Fresh Start last night, I was dying to get home and take some drugs for my headache! I don't know if it was the back massage my mom so graciously consented to give me, the pork chop, the two bites of vanilla bean ice cream, or the pill, but by the time I hopped in bed, my headache was considerably better.

We think that what we want is sex, drugs, alcohol, a new job, a raise, a doctorate, a spouse, a large-screen TV, a new car, a cabin, a condo in Hawaii. What we really want is the person we were made for, Jesus, and the place we were made for, Heaven. Nothing less can satisfy.

We may imagine that we want a thousand different things, but God is the one we really long for. His presence brings satisfaction; his absence brings thirst and longing.

To see God's face is to behold His beauty which is the source of all lesser beauties.

- Randy Alcorn

Whip it good!

The party was a success. Even though it seemed no one could make it, we still had a group of 16, which was a nice size. AMC (Awesome Married Couple) brought so much stuff and really they were the hosts in my opinion. I provided the place, but they, pretty much, took care of the rest. We did a lot of tubing, and as much as Big D tried to whip me around and get me to wipe out, I managed to stay on the whole time, even while balancing on my knees, taunting him and challenging him to try harder. I knew when he circled the island a 3rd time that he really wanted to see me tossed off. Nah-NAH-nah-NAH. Other than tubing, we just relaxed in the sun and ate snacks all day. A bunch of us played a few games of volleyball, too. When I saw that the sun wasn't going to be around much longer, I asked Big D to pull me skiing. I'm so glad I did, too. It's probably my last time this year, and it was beautiful. The lake was like glass and on one side of the island it felt as though I was slalom-ing into the sunset. Gorgeous. Dinner was great. I expected AMC to buy pre-made burgers for grilling, but they actually bought the meat and pre-made the patties themselves! They also brought baked beans and potato salad (great summer side dishes). M brought her famous cheesecake (in pumpkin and toffee flavors) that she actually sells to a few restaurants. I don't even like cheesecake, but this was good. It even looked amazing. The day was made pretty much perfect when the Huskers beat Wake Forest 31-3. The only negative about today is that I want to rip my eyeballs out of their sockets because they itch and burn so bad from my all-day exposure to everything I'm allergic to. But, I suppose it was worth it :)

The beach party

I had planned to go on the church retreat this weekend, but ended up opting out. I'm so sad to miss hearing Cousin speak (my cousins and I all call each other "Cousin!" as opposed to using our real first names), because he is one of my favorite people to listen to. He has so much passion and I'm always impacted by his messages! Fortunately, I'm sure I can get the audio. What AMC (Awesome Married Couple) and I decided to do, instead, was to have a party out at my g-ma's lake. It may be our last truly hot weekend here in NE - you never know. Plus, we've wanted to all summer and, of course, never got around to it. The problem with waiting until the last minute is that a lot of people have already made commitments and several have season football tickets or weddings to attend. BUT, it looks like we'll still have a good-sized group of people out today and I'm excited to get together with everyone. I'm pretty sure I'll be the only single person there, but that's cool. J offered to come and leave her hubby at home, which was really sweet of her, but no way would I want her to actually do that. I'm way too laid back about this party-thing. AMC has asked me all these questions regarding the party this week and getting ready for it. They wanted to make sure all the bases were covered. And, here I sit, with people coming out in less than 3 hours, and I've yet to make a side dish or pump up the tube! Yikes! My brother was sweet enough to go out and make sure the boats had enough gas and oil last night. He's so great. AMC is supplying all the meat for grilling out, which is so nice of them. I've got to make sure the TVs are on the proper channels so we can keep an eye on the games today, too. Iowa plays Iowa State and I have a lot of (unfortunately) ISU fans coming out today -hehe. I do want to watch that game, but I am, by no means, a fan. I'm a little nervous about our game vs. Wake Forest tonight - should be interesting. I better get my suit on and get out there. I'm missing some prime-sunlight hours.

Boys and Babies

I'm feeling a little left behind. "Oldest" friend (we go back to 6th grade) just called and told me she's pregnant. And she let me know that one of my high school friends is engaged. T just told me last week that he's engaged as well! And I've had two other friends announce that they, too, will be having babies the beginning of next year! So now, not only is everyone getting married (I've been a part of 4 weddings in a year's time), they're having babies, too! Fortunately, this doesn't bother me much at all. I'm so excited to watch everyone fall in love and start their families. I know my time will come. But, it's a little strange when suddenly, within a year's time, your relationship with someone changes. You may grow completely apart because of a guy or you may just not be able to talk as much or hang out as randomly as you used to because of a husband or baby. I counted and realized that I have only two single friends left. Thankfully one of them is Best Friend, and I don't know what I would do without her. But, there's no more group of girls. There's no more dropping by AMC's (Awesome Married Couple) house all the time because the baby requires so much attention. Sometimes I kinda wish I could relate and chat about my husband or baby, but I don't have either. Not even a boyfriend. I love being single and so much enjoy my freedom. I've never been one to daydream about my husband when I have no idea who he is or what he'll be like. But, being single does mean that many of my friends are in a different place than I am. They're one or two "life steps" ahead of me. I would like to someday double-date with kid-less friends, but the chances of that happening are getting slim. Meanwhile, I'll enjoy attending more weddings and baby showers, and know that God's timing is so perfect.

Long Weekend

The long weekend was so nice. I went to a co-worker's wedding on Sunday and loved it. It was my first time attending an African-American wedding. She played one of my favorite love songs when she walked down the aisle - "Spend My Life With You" and she had about 3 soloists that did an awesome job! I loved the pastor, too. Let's just say the message was pretty lively! After the wedding, I went to an all-black Baptist church for their anniversary service. I was the only white person amongst a few hundred black people and they were all dressed in white! Surprisingly enough, I didn't feel out of place at all. A couple of choirs performed and made me want to jump out of my seat and start dancing like one of the girls I came with . . I should've. Instead, I just bounced around in my seat a little. I've always wanted to attend a black church service and I'd love to go again.

Sunday night was another "Cousins Night"! I love my cousins. Even though we live close, we don't get to see each other that often. But, when we do, it's a blast. Dancing, eating, movies, chats, and silliness. It was a late night. We woke up the next day to rain! I was so bitter. Rain on Labor Day?! I was supposed to get a tan! Instead, it was raining so hard, we couldn't see the other side of the lake! My family is so great that I really couldn't complain being cooped up in Grandma's house with all of them eating appetizers all day. It cleared up in the late afternoon, though, in time to get a pontoon ride in and teach one of our guests to water ski. Supper was burgers and brats off the grill, Grandma's signature baked beans, potato casserole, corn on the cob, fresh fruits and veggies. . and more . . with ice cream and (my fave) triple choc cake again for dessert.

All in all, it was a great weekend and I hated to see Tuesday come. How was your weekend?

It's Game Day

Best friend called it first. We always try to be the first one to announce that "It's Game Day" or even "Pre-Game Day" for that matter. She called it last night at 12:15 a.m. And she's the lucky one that gets to go watch the Huskers kick off their 2005 season with a game against the Maine Black Bears tonight. If we win this game, it will be our 20th straight season-opening victory. We've never played MU before and they're our only Division I-AA opponent this season, just as we are their only Division I-A opponent. I'm not real worried about this game. I know Maine had a really tough schedule last season and they beat their first-ever Division I-A opponent, Mississippi State 9-7, but with our 2005 recruiting class (supposedly one of the nation's best) and some great players returning (ie: Daniel Bullocks, Cory Ross) it shouldn't be an issue. Go Big Red!

Last night was a good time with Best Friend. She & I, instead of eating out, decided on a $.69 box of mac n cheese and leftover pizza while watching the "Concert for Hurricane Relief" and gasping at the idiotic, emotional statements made by Kanye. I can't even comment about it, because I will go on and on. I do not, in any way, think that this is a race issue. I'm praying for the people who have lost everything; it breaks my heart. It makes me think of the end times and how close we may be to seeing Jesus return.

Best friend and I went to this documentary/movie called "Mad Hot Ballroom" which we loved. It was about 5th grade inner-city kids in NYC and their required ballroom classes and competition. It was so cute and I definitely recommend it. It makes me miss ballroom dancing. I haven't gone in a couple months - it's hard to find someone willing to go with me. After the movie, we snuck into "Wedding Crashers", which made it my 3rd time seeing it, and I still laughed throughout the whole thing. I want to recommend it to people, but I can't because of the language and nudity - dang! I just wouldn't feel right about that. But, Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson are hilarious! Best friend loved it, too.

I feel pretty lazy right now. It's noon and I'm in my pajamas, because I slept until 11, which I haven't done in ages and didn't even think I was capable of it. But, last night, after getting home around 1 a.m., I discovered two boxes in my living room. . . . "I got a Dell!" So I had to open them and play around on my new 'notebook'. I forgot I had gotten a printer, too. You may remember my blog about buying myself an iPod, which I did . . . and two days later I decided I needed a new computer. Mine is 5 years old and . . I need a new one. I discovered that my iPod was not compatible with my parents computer (which has Microsoft ME) and realized that I wanted to put iTunes on my computer anyway since I won't/shouldn't be living here too much longer. Soo, that meant new computer. She's a beauty, too. (I named her "Adella" - don't think I'm a dork - you have to name your computer when you start it up.) I called Dell up and had them customize my Inspiron 6000. I was a little nervous dropping $1500 in one week (on both gadgets) but it made me feel better to know that I did get some deals. I saved $200 on the Back to School sales w/ Dell and I got the guy at Best Buy to throw in the iPod armband for free. So, I feel good about it.

Well, I'm pumped about this weekend. It's supposed to be hot and I plan to spend the rest of today on the beach at the lake (as well as Sunday and Labor Day with family). Have a great holiday weekend everyone!

Lost . . and Found

I pride myself on taking good care of my belongings and never losing anything. But lately, I've realized that there are several things that I have been missing for quite awhile. Such as:

- this cute floral button-down Abercrombie shirt that I only wore a few times
- camel-colored leather Mia wooden heels that went with everything
- my favorite comb that is broken but, nevertheless, it's my favorite
- the remote control to my stereo
- Wired hair gel that I used every time I wore my hair wavy
- my super-comfy Reef flip-flops
- my digital camera software CD (which has been the source of many frustrations lately since downloading off the Internet has somehow not been working)
- my favorite yellow highlighter
- my fonts and clips CD for scrapbooking
- my Tim McGraw CD

Some of these things I've been missing for months and I still wonder where they could've gone (especially the heels). You would've thought that when I moved four months ago some of these things would show up, but no such luck. All this has lead me to believe that I shouldn't brag about never misplacing things, because clearly organization is not my strong point. I like to say I am organized, because I do love organization and everything in its place, but let's just say, it doesn't come naturally. I suppose I claim to be tidy, because I dream of someday achieving a lifestyle of tidiness and hope that proclaiming that over myself will one day result in me being the perfect housekeeper I dream of being. . . . It's possible.

Update: I cleaned my room and even bothered to finish emptying my suitcase from vacation a month ago - and, sure enough, I have now recovered my comb, my flip flops, and my hair gel. Yess.

My knees

My knees are tomboys
I'm proud of them and I wear my dresses short
[I could] worry I will never marry with knees like that
But I know there's someone out there
Who will say to me:
I love you and I love your knees
I want the four of us to grow old together

-This Nikewomen.com ad made me think of my scarred knees; the left with two scars from two ACL surgeries (one is huge); the right with a small scar from falling on the playground in 3rd grade and getting stitches. I suppose they add character.

Life-Giving Life

Pastor Les gave the greatest message yesterday. He talked about "How to Live a Life-Giving Life". God had a plan for mankind from the very beginning and when He comes back, He will restore things to the way He first intended them to be (and those who know Him can live with Him forever). God's desire is for us to live a life-giving life. Isn't it so awesome that he doesn't just want to forgive us to forgive us, but to offer us a full life?!

It always saddens me to see others living for themselves and their temporary pleasures believing that living for God will spoil their fun. It's the complete opposite! I was talking to a friend the other day who said to me, "I know you have fun, but I couldn't have fun the way you do" (meaning sober and living for the Lord). What a lie! God is the one who created fun and pleasure. My friend may be having a good time with his friends (I don't dispute that), but he has no idea that he is missing out on so much more. Life is about a lot more than having an occasional good time. When I observe my friend in his "element" where he is drinking too much and getting loud and rowdy with friends, what I see is someone who desperately wants to live a full life , have relationships with people, feel good about who he is and be likeable (gain affirmation from others), and when I talk to him about life, I see someone who wants to have a purpose in life. This is the way God made him. This is the way God made all of us.

From the very beginning, He meant for us to have a wonderful friendship with Him and with others, filled with love. He wanted us to care more about other people than we do ourselves, because we gain our sense of self from Him and not from the people we're around or what we see when we look at ourselves. He wanted us to "be fruitful and increase" and have a great destiny.

Pastor Les talked about the two trees in the middle of the garden of Eden - the Tree of Life and the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. There were lots of trees in the garden that Adam and Eve could eat from (God is all about freedom). There was one that he told them not to. The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. I've always been able to comprehend why we shouldn't know about evil - because it will steal from us, kill us, and destroy us (even when it looks so appealing). But, it was interesting to see why God didn't want us to have a knowledge of good either. Because a knowledge of good causes us to see ourselves as never good enough. It causes us to see things as good, better, and best and we are always comparing and striving to be good people. If we eat from the tree of the KG&E, then emotionally, spiritually, and mentally we will die. "Every wound, hurt, grudge, pressure, fear, and struggle, has its source in the tree of the KG&E."

Thank you, God, for the Tree of Life. Thank you that we can choose You and choose life. And fulfilling, love-filled life at that!
(Click on my Trinity Church link and hear the message for yourself.)

No one like You

I've been dreaming of you
My thoughts are always on you

There is no one like you - I know, I've looked
There is something about the way you touch my heart
In that place that no one else could ever touch

I've been singing of you
My heart is always towards you
I've been dancing with you, my King
I just want to be embraced in the arms of my King

There is no one like you - I know, I've looked
There is something about the way you touch my heart
In that place that no one else could ever touch . . . . . they could never touch

No one touches my heart like you do
No one touches my heart like you do

- "Taken Back; My Only", Brownsville Youth Worship CD

Fall Fever

I have a love/hate relationship with Fall. Before fall comes, I feel excited about all the things it brings. Fall means, first and foremost, football season. (Can't wait to see the Huskers play this year. Last year, I was standing behind the Estee Lauder counter almost every Saturday!) I also love the smells of fall and watching the trees change color over the months. (This year, BF and I are planning on getting some great pics outdoors.) Fall means jean jackets and hoodies - two of my favorite things. It means I can go golfing without breaking a sweat. It means pumpkins and Thanksgiving are coming soon, and Christmas is right around the corner. So, as much as I hate seeing summer come to an end (because it is my favorite season), there is a lot to look forward to in the fall. This, however, is my attitude before the ragweed fills the air and I remember that Fall is . . . allergy season. I'm basically allergic to the outdoors. It means hay fever. . . itchy eyes, itchy throat, an itch that goes deep into my inner ears . . . sneezing that brings on headaches, and either serious drainage, congestion, or runny nose (I'm not sure which I prefer).

I remember the first time my allergies hit. I was in the 3rd grade, playing soccer out on the field, and had to get sent home from school because my eyes were so swollen that I looked like I'd been hit in the face with a bat. Every year I hope for a miracle and wait until it hits before I'll get my meds. This year, it came a week later than usual, and yesterday I was forced to stock up on prescription pills, nasal spray, and eye drops in hopes that this fall will be bearable.

23 Random Questions

Fridays are slow days at work. I love it. It's a good way to wind down and prepare for the weekend. I found this on another blog and thought it might be fun:

1. if you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to go back in time and fix all your mistakes which would you choose?
i'd take the money. the mistakes i've made have taught me a lot.

2. when you look at yourself in the mirror, what's the first thing you look at?
my eyes

3. how much cash do you have on you right now?
all the cash i'll need to live on for the next two weeks.

4. favorite plant? i love hostas (sp??) outdoors

5. who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? Ben (XB)

6. what is your main ring tone on your phone? just a plain ring tone

7. what shirt are you wearing? an abercrombie tee (it's casual day!)

8. do you "label" yourself? nope - that would be hard to do

9. name brand of your shoes currently wearing? Gap flip flops

10. do you prefer a bright or dark room?depends on the situation.

11. what did you have for breakfast? wheaties

12. what were you doing at midnight last night?sleeping!

13. last thought you had before you had a wreck? oh my gosh! she's going to hit me!

14. what did your last text message you received on your cell phone say? "I have fringe group until 8:30" (jenni letting me know she's busy)

15. what's an expression that you say a lot? I feel like I say "Mercy" a lot, but I have a new cousin with that name, so I may need to find a new expression

16. who told you they loved you last? best friend

17. last furry thing you touched? nelly, my cat

18. how many hours a week do you work? 40

19. how many rolls of film do you need to get developed? none; i do digital

20. favorite age you have been so far? hmm, either 19 or 23; every age has had its perks i think

21. your worst enemy? Satan of course

22. what is your current desk top picture? one of my favorite beaches

23. what was the last thing you said to someone?
"i'm glad they're improving the training procedures" (because it sucked when I was trained)

Family Pics @ Ventura

Yay! A picture. Here's Alyssa, Joy, & I at Grandma's lake. We were there celebrating a bunch of family birthdays in the month of August . It was also the night of the annual Lake Ventura family picnic.







Dad got a drum set for his 50th! He used to play in a band. Now all he needs is a Harley.



Justin (cousin) was back visiting from D.C. so we all had our usual discussion on politics. Too bad his wife, Kier, couldn't come along this trip. He'll be a dad in just a few months. Can't wait to see what they're having.


Grandma was the perfect hostess, as usual. She loves having people out. Unfortunately she didn't cook tonight. But we had three different kinds of dessert after unwrapping gifts.

She's Gone Country

BF (best friend) & I fell in love with country music about six years ago. I was a big-time hater until she made me listen to "It's Your Love". After that, I listened to country radio constantly just hear that song, meanwhile discovering tons of other great songs. One of our fave songs back then was "Little Red Rodeo" by Collin Raye. So, when we found out he was going to be in town last Friday, we decided to go. We've just recently begun listening to country again, so it was the perfect time to go to our first country concert. We put on our straw cowboy hats right before we got out of the car and made sure to park by the big flashing sign so we wouldn't get lost like last time we were at Mid-America. We hadn't gotten our tickets yet, but when we asked for the best we ended up with tickets right in the middle of the front row! (Too bad it wasn't a Coldplay concert or something.) Anyway, it was a good time. Even got to shake Collin's hand - ooooh.

Afterwards, we got into Ribfest free and heard what's-his-name sing "Hicktown" which is also one of my current favorites. I tried some deep-fried Oreos and we walked around looking for a good place to take a picture. After finding a spot, we just stood there waiting for someone to walk by who we felt comfortable asking to take a picture of us. After about five minutes of waiting and letting a ton of people walk by, BF says, "Laur, everyone here is W.T. We have to just ask someone." (And she meant that in the nicest way possible.) But I mean, hasn't that ever happened to you? You're wanting to ask someone to take your picture, but no one "feels" right. They either look mean, or unclean, or too old to know how to use a camera. Finally, there they were - the perfect couple. And the man loved taking pictures. He even offered to take more than one. It pays to wait, I guess. Wish I could post one of the pics - they're so cute - but I lost my digital camera software CD. Oh, but don't worry - my next buy will be a cute little Canon I've been eyeing for a long time.

The Plan

So, today I'm starting "The Plan" which really isn't much of plan, because I have very vague guidelines that I am following. Nevertheless, I hope to follow my gut (only not literally because then I will fail) and the basic guidelines of my plan and get back in shape the way I want to be. I plan to not eat any dessert (please don't tempt me) lots of fruits and veggies, small portions, no pasta, only 100% whole grain bread (because I heard the way to lose is by staying away from enriched flour), and exercise 4-5 times a week. In order to motivate myself to exercise more, I am buying an iPod tonight. I have wanted one for over a year and I feel like being impulsive today. Just don't tell those holding me accountable to my budget. I've thought about getting my heart broken again, because that's always a good motivator, but when the opportunity presented itself I decided against it. Of course it's not really that I need motivation. I want to work out, but so many things really do get in the way and then it just doesn't fit into my schedule as often as it used to. But, I figure with fall approaching it won't be so terribly hot and humid at night, so I can power walk or run a lot. So far, my first day has been pretty successful. I've eaten a chicken salad, veggies, and a very small pizza (not the best choice), and I power-walked 3 miles. So, I'm optimistic. I'm off to do some crunches . . .

The wind in my face

Do you ever have those moments when you think, "Life couldn't be better than right now in this moment" and you just want to freeze the moment or keep reliving it over and over? It's like something wells up inside of you and you're just . . . happy. I've had many moments like that, but I've noticed lately that one thing invariably gives me that feeling every time . . . the wind in my face.

Le Crocodile & Other Guilty Pleasures

I was in one of my favorite boutiques the other day (which I have yet to actually buy anything from) when I spotted a book called, "1,001 Guilty Pleasures: The Things We Hate to Love". I flipped it open and it landed right on one of my favorite things . . . Lacoste shirts. They're stuffy and preppy, but I love 'em. . . and I've been known to pay too much for them. And it's not just because I love the alligator . . (which I just found out is actually a crocodile, named after golf pro, Rene Lacoste, "Le Crocodile") . . it's because it reminds me of my grandpa. I was so young when he passed away, but I remember the 80s and how he would go golfing in his plaid pants, cardigan sweaters, and Lacoste (Izod) polos. I realize that, back then, that was not exactly an unusual thing to wear, but it still just reminds me of Grandpa. I remember the first time I bought my own . . . 6 years ago, at Weekenders on Pearl Street in Boulder. It was a navy blue t-shirt at half price, which was still a lot for a t-shirt, but I didn't care. I was little upset when my mom washed it improperly and the color faded really bad, but I suppose it gives it character and perhaps gives it a really cool vintage look. I remember saying, "Mom, this is made in France - you can't wash it like a regular shirt." My next purchase was in Scottsdale where I made what was then my biggest splurge to date and bought a white velour cap-sleeve jacket with cute blocks of color on the shoulders. Only my best friend and her brother know, and will ever know, how much it set me back. Since then, I've only bought one more, a camo green polo, with my excellent Von Maur discount. The thing is, it's not like these shirts are that cool. They might be cool if they were actually vintage 80s, but they're not. I mean it's not like I'm turning heads and everyone is coveting my designer threads. But, alas, my sentimental self just loves them. And, this is why Lacoste shirts are one of my guilty pleasures . . one of the many things I hate to love.
Other guilty pleasures include: Michael Bolton, Rod Stewart, Ashlee Simpson (dare I even admit this), Macaroni & Cheese w/ peas (always), large amounts of cookie dough, country music videos, and the Bachelor. And you??? . . .

Happy on my Birthday

Yesterday was great. It was such a nice day. For starters, my dad had left me very sweet note on my bathroom mirror, that I found when stumbling into the dark bathroom before the sun had come up. It was a great thing to wake up to. I worked, of course, but I knew I couldn't let it be just any ordinary work day. I share a birthday with one of my favorite co-workers, so I asked her what her favorite cake was (cheesecake) and I brought both her favorite and mine (triple chocolate bundt cake) to share with everyone. (Thanks to Mom for baking my favorite at 10 o'clock at night!) I was shocked to find my desk decorated with balloons and streamers when I got to work (and I hear they only do that for people they like - phew!) Let me just say it really does make a difference in your work day when you're surrounded by birthday decorations. Once I sent out the email to my department letting them know about the cakes (though it was 9:30 a.m.), less than 2 minutes later I had some hungry visitors coming in the door with plate and fork in hand, singing a jazzy rendition of "Happy Birthday". Let's just say the cakes were gone before too long. I brought birthday hats, too, and some people actually wore them. I got a couple of cute e-cards at work and took a break with my friend who gave me some cute Kenneth Cole travel bags. I received a couple phone calls over lunch, too. After work, I picked up my best friend, (who got me a cool piece of pottery and a belt from Peru, plus a GC to Sheridan's Custard-yum!) and we went to Firebirds with my mom and grandma. It was so delicious. I got salmon, of course, with mashed potatoes and peppers, and shared a chocolate dessert with my best friend. I opened up my birthday gift from my grandma and parents - a white gold necklace with yellow topaz pendant. It's so pretty! BF & I went to Wal-Mart to pick up . . . The Cosby Show on DVD and went back to her place to watch the pilot. We also watched that Tommy Lee show where he goes to school at UNL, which was pretty cool since we both went to college there (me, only freshman year). And, by the way, that dorm he's living in is NOT in the Neihardt honors dorm - it's way bigger. All that to say . . . my birthday was so great. It's so much more fun when you don't expect the world to revolve around you.

Tuesday

My birthday is in two days and it's gonna be great. And the reason it's gonna be great is because I have no expectations. I've decided over the past couple of years that if you just treat your birthday like an ordinary day, it will most likely be an extra ordinary day. When you get to be my age, there really isn't a whole lot to look forward to. I mean, what happens when you turn 24 besides realizing that you're not where you thought you would be five years ago? . . not that I'm complaining, because I have a wonderful life and I'm content where I am, yet anticipating the next thing. I'm just saying that it's not like it used to be when I was younger. There was always the birthday party with all your friends, playing games, unwrapping a bunch of gifts, and having everyone make a fuss over you. But when you get older, you don't want to plan a party, because what will you do and who will come, and you don't necessarily have a group of friends anymore. Last year I had a small, random bunch of people over at the last minute and (though I was blessed that people actually showed up and friends even surprised me with a cake-very sweet of them) it was just a little weird. Everyone was gone by ten and I just sat in my room the rest of the night wondering why I even invited people over. So, I've decided that I'm not going to plan on having fun on my birthday and then when someone wishes me a "Happy Birthday" it will just be a pleasant surprise, because I won't even be thinking about it being my birthday. And if I get a gift, it, too, will be somewhat unexpected. "For me?" Besides when you get older and have a job, you don't really need anything anyway. So, I have no idea what Tuesday will be like, but I have no expectations so I'm sure it'll turn out to be a pretty nice day.

X & Y

You're in control, is there anywhere you wanna go?
You're in control, is there anything you wanna know?
The future's for discovering
The space in which we travel in

-coldplay, "square one", x & y

"In mathematics X and Y were always the answers, but in life no one knows. To me the album is about those unanswerable questions, and what you should do about the fact that you can’t explain all the unknown variables” - Chris Martin

I got the new Coldplay CD a few weeks ago and it's awesome! I highly recommend it. I had been anticipating it for so long. I can remember hating the band when I first heard them a few years ago, but after being made to listen to them a few times, I, too, became a big fan. Unlike the first two albums, this one didn't take a lot of listens for me to get into it. It was an immediate hit with me. It's true when they say Coldplay is "a band that belongs to the world but fans believe that the music is for them alone". I don't know if it's the guitars, Chris Martin's soothing voice, how each song seems to build perfectly . . . but these guys are good.

My music pastor wrote a positive review on their new album and below is his conclusion:

"Coldplay are not only connecting with people through their lyrics, but also through their music. A group of four guys who all play their own instruments well, along with arrangements that are not overly produced, cluttered or over-polished is all quite refreshing in these days of synthetic pop and banal rap, (I apologize if you are a fan of these types of music but its just, well, bad music).
"Chris Martin is definitely a man searching for answers, along with a genuine concern for the downtrodden - when he asks questions they are, for the most part, the right questions to be asking. Sadly, he's looking for answers in the wrong places. When Martin is offering advice and counsel, he resorts to a humanism that trusts in the goodness of the human heart - but without the healing work of Christ, 'the heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked.' Jeremiah 17:9"

Here's to You

Today is my dad's 50th birthday. Wow! Sorry, but that sounds old to me. And to think I'm nearly half way there! I decided since today is so special that I would write a blog about Dad - some things I like about him and some good memories I have.

So, what do I like about Dad?:
(in no particular order)
1. He's funny and has a great sense of humor- he's famous for the one-liners and he always has a new joke to tell
2. He's a good story teller - he can always make you feel like you were there
3. He's sentimental - so I don't have to be the only one who's attached to places and songs because of the memories they evoke
4. He has a good memory - which goes hand-in-hand with his great story-telling and sentimentality and means I get to hear all the details of what my grandpa was like and what my aunts and uncles were like when they were younger
5. He loves to laugh - and you can hear him a mile away, believe me
6. He dresses cool - so I've never had to be embarrassed to be with him in public :)
7. He likes cars - and sells them (how convenient) and can name any make and model and year waaay back into the . . . well almost since cars were first made
8. He's a hard-worker - and ever since I was a baby he's been working long days, pounding the pavement, selling cars so I could eat (thanks Dad!)
9. He's smart - and he knows something about everything
10. He loves his family - and he shows us
11. He's loyal - and a good friend to others
12. He has integrity - and follows his convictions

So, what are some things I remember about Dad?:
1. I remember him tickling me pretty much every day until I eventually grew numb to it
2. I remember peeing on him, after I warned him to stop tickling me
3. I remember watching Miami Vice and Dallas with him when I was little
4. I remember listening to the Casey Casum's Top 40 on the way to church every Sunday in his demos (cars) as his fingers would drum on the steering wheel and I fell in love with songs by Madonna, Billy Joel, Janet Jackson, and Michael Bolton
5. I remember being his "median" (comedian)
6. I remember finishing his sentences when he'd quote Monty Python, Arnold Schwarzengger, and Robin Leach
7. I remember when he won me a stuffed puppy at Adventureland and I named it "Ace" (I was devastated when I lost it)
8. I remember when he'd tease me about how perfect and angelic my little sister was, because she looked so innocent and she always gave him hugs . . . but I knew he loved me just as much
9. I remember when we'd make jokes together about my mom being Czech and growing up on a farm (even though I now love to hear stories about my ancestors).
10. I remember when he'd slip me extra money and tell me not to tell Mom
11. I remember when he took me to my first R-rated movie, "Con-Air"
12. I remember when he taught me how to slalom water-ski
13. Singing to our song, "Unbelievable" in the car

So, here's to you, Dad. I love you!

One of the best days ever

I woke up this morning expecting my Sunday to be just another Sunday. I had no idea what lie in store. I went to church and stayed two services because there were two guest speakers preaching today - both quite good - they spoke on living through the storms in life and intercessory prayer. After church, my grandma treated me to lunch at Charleston's (mmm - one of my faves) with my aunt and uncle. I love eating out with my uncle, because he always asks me meaningful questions. However, I then have to take time to think of the answers and explain them, which means once everyone else is half done with their meal, I haven't even started mine. He asks me questions like, "Give me your dream update: If God said you could do anything you wanted to and you would be successful, what would you do?" (He's always encouraging people to dream big.) And, "Where would you like to be in 20 years?" And, "What kingdom impact do you most like to have on others?", etc. It's so good to be asked questions that make you think. After my delicious lunch, grandma dropped me at home where I did a whole lot of nothing until I went back to church to greet for TerraNova. I was sad to leave TN with no plans and drove home realizing my weekend was over. Oh, but it wasn't. On my way home, I stopped off at Wal-Mart to pick up some pictures I'd had developed, and while I was waiting for an employee to get them, I browsed the DVD new release section. I couldn't believe what I found. . . only the best TV sitcom ever made! The Cosby Show: Season I on DVD!!! And, how convenient! My birthday is only 9 days away! If only you knew how long I've been waiting for this to come out . . . and really I had no reason to believe it would. I even got online and sent an email to NBC requesting that it be sold on DVD. Soo, this pretty much makes today one of the best days ever! Ok, that may be an exaggeration, but I'm really excited.

Happy

My vacation was so great! It really couldn't have been better. I left work an hour and a half early and I was extremely tired from waking up that morning at 5 a.m. I arrived at my friends' house to find that, yes, they did want me to drive an extra car (not my own) down to the lake house. Why my friend's mother, the owner of the car, couldn't drive it down, I'm not sure. Don't think I'm complaining . . I wouldn't have minded had I not felt so exhausted. I mean, I was fighting to keep my eyes open at work and now I was facing a 7 hour drive south that required me to not only be awake, but to be alert. Oh, but I wouldn't be in the car alone. Grandma was going to ride with me, and her shihtzu, Angel. Grandma Emma is 90 years old and very sweet . . . she also has lost 50% of her hearing. So for the first 3 hours of the trip, I was pretty much yelling in order to have conversation with her. You would have thought this would've kept me awake, but I was still struggling. We stopped at Mr. Goodcents, as always, and my friend decided he couldn't handle having his mother ride in the car with him. So . . . now "Mom", and not Grandma, was my companion. Though "Mom" is pretty much an emotional mess (that's as close as I can come to describing her), I was optimistic that she would prove to be a better conversationalist. And she was. I was able to hear about all the bad things that have happened in her life and we went round in circles discussing what it means to know Jesus and how one can have a relationship with him. Circles, because she seemed to always contradict herself. Isn't it frustrating when you're sharing with someone who a) doesn't have revelation, which only comes from the Holy Spirit or b) knows how much they need the Lord, but just won't surrender their life? I couldn't figure out which of these applied to her. But, she kept me awake trying.
At last, we made it to our destination and my vacation really began. The next 3 days were awesome! I love my friends' boat. It's so big and so beautiful. Every day, we'd just drive around, the three of us, my girl friend and I laying out in the front talking, as her husband drove for hours. Occasionally we'd stop and jump in to cool off, and then we'd drive some more. I went tubing once, but other than that, we just relaxed. Every night we ate out - twice at my favorite BBQ place. And every night, we got dessert. The last evening, we went out on the boat after dark and just sat in the cove under the stars - it was so calm, so perfect out.
Every morning, I'd wake up and have my quiet times as I looked out my window to see all the trees and a glimpse of the lake. It was great to have time away from everyday life when I could really reflect on where I am in life and what the Lord's next step is for me. It resulted in me setting a couple of goals for myself. . . something that is so easy not to do. I'm so thankful for my job, but I don't want to become complacent and not be looking forward. It would be easy to stay where I am, though I know my job is temporary, and just wait for the Lord to bring something along. But I know I've got to be moving. In a message I once heard about finding God's will for your life, this guy said that you should ask yourself if what you're doing is bringing God the most glory. And, yes, we can bring him glory just by loving him and living for him, but he's also given each of us giftings and he wants to see us use those. Reality is that I have to work, and I don't expect to ever love doing it, but I don't want to just do anything - I want to do something that is a good fit for who God's made me to be - and I don't want to do it half-heartedly - I want to do it as unto Him. For most people that doesn't happen right away and I couldn't wait for the perfect fit to just come along. I had to be responsible and get a job that I'm honestly not excited about, though I'm grateful for it. But I don't want to settle for it. I have an idea now of what I want to pursue job-wise. If the Lord wants to step in and close the door, that's ok, but, for now, I'm going to start moving.
This weekend was great! - I got a tan, a vision, and a toe ring that says exactly how I feel right now . . . Happy.

Summer Vacation

Tomorrow I leave on vacation. I'm going back to Table Rock Lake down in Branson. Never thought Branson would be the #1 place I wanted to go on a summer vacation. I went down twice last year and I absolutely loved it. My trips were filled with food, fun, and sun - all the things that make a summer vacation great. Last year I spent long days in the sun (what is better than laying out on the back of a huge boat while my friend drives around the lake for hours ? . . hmm, I think nothing), caught some great air jet-skiing (thanks to a friend who sat on the back so I wouldn't be afraid to hit the big ones), jumped off of a cliff (several times, though it took me awhile at first), went tubing, of course hit the outlet malls (got a few great deals, as always), and I even went to a show (which was surprisingly funny, though I could've done w/o the twangy country songs in between the comedy acts . . I love country, but not the old stuff). This year I have big plans as well. This weekend my goals are: to have some great quiet times with Jesus, to get a good tan (w/o burning first), to wear flip flops, zero make-up and wavy hair every day, to eat Scottie's custard every night, to get up on the wakeboard, and maybe even to splurge and go parasailing. . . and don't think I forgot about visiting the outlet malls again. But, in order to leave early for my trip tomorrow I'm going to work at 7 o'clock, which means . . . I should be in bed right now.

Leave me alone

I never thought my favorite thing to do on any given night would be to just be alone. I once used to scroll through my phone book looking for someone to call in order to never have a night where it was just me.

The first time I recall really hating to be alone was when I turned 16 and got my first car. I would beg someone to come with me so I didn't have to fill up with gas all by myself . . or go to the store . . or do anything really. Looking back, it probably was an insecurity I had, but it was mixed with a geniune love for people and spending quality time with them.

In college, I was able to share an apartment with 3 girls, even 4 at one point. I absolutely loved it. There was always something to do, someone to watch TV with or even run an errand. It's not that I never had my quiet times, but I was always thrilled to hear the door open and see which of my roommates had come home.

After moving in with a married couple for a short time, I found myself content to stay home occasionally and read or watch a movie all by myself. But, of course, I still preferred the company of a friend to nights alone. I used to feel that TOO much time spent alone was a waste if I wasn't investing in my friendships.

And, now . . now that I have a full time job, I feel differently. I feel glad to leave Omaha each day and drive home to a place much less busy where I can do nothing and feel it was time well spent. As much as I still love being social and being with friends, I almost cringe when I plan something on a weeknight and know I won't be home until late. I love reading alone, scrapbooking alone, going to the store alone, and going to the lake alone. I feel that I've been productive, because it gives me a chance to refuel for the next day at work. I've come to realize that just as much as I need my friends and my social time, my alone time allows me to thrive as well.

Oh, what a night!

It's been a long time since I've posted anything, but I had such a fun night the other night that I thought I'd write about it.

My best friend and I have a motto about eating "If one can sleep well, think well, and live well, one must dine well". Back in January we'd decided to eat somewhere new once a month, but we hadn't done it since. So, last week, we thought we'd try out another new restaurant. After looking online at a list of restaurants and not being able to decide on one, we finally settled on Bistro 121.

Once we walked in the door, I had this feeling . . . this feeling that I'm not going to be able to afford this restaurant. In a matter of seconds we were seated and once our menus were handed to us, we just stared down at them, looked up at each other, and I realized the feeling was right. Pretty much every entree was over $20. We thought about splitting the salmon or the crab cakes with maybe some lobster bisque on the side, but I was way too hungry to share. So, after we've sat there for about 10 minutes thinking "Do we stay or do we go?", feeling bad, knowing we'll feel worse if we pay for this food, we see our waitress start to head over to our table. My best friend cringed and said "Here she comes; what do we do?!" I panicked for a split second, but then, very apologetically, told her that we really couldn't afford to eat there. Fortunately she was very understanding and confided that she really couldn't afford to eat there either. The embarrassment lasted only a few moments until we were out the door and realized that we survived the experience.

Now where? I ended up convincing my best friend to go to this great greek/mediterranean bistro where it was open to the outside. We sat on the patio for a few hours eating our gyro, falafel . . . and creme brulee (Mmmm). . . The owner treated us to a couple of glasses of wine. . . the weather was beautiful . . . conversation was good . . . perfect night! We spotted this waiter (good-looking, great build) and my best friend wanted to know if he was a Christian. We considered asking him ourselves when I realized I know a girl that works there who is a Christian so we can just ask her. I'm sure you can guess what she said . . . But we both kept talking about how awesome it would be if a hot guy came up to one of us and asked if we loved Jesus. Not very likely, but it would be cool.

After dinner, we tok a nice stroll around a small lake and talked about moving away for a little while. I, honestly, am pretty content where I am, but it does sound fun and adventurous to live somewhere else, and every time I travel it makes me want to move. Jesus, my best friend, a good church, and the mountains . . . what more do I need? A job. Yeah, I need a job. Then, I'd be set. Back in the car, we sang loud to our new theme song about moving forward and facing our fears and for a few minutes we were 100% sure we were moving.

What would a night be without ice cream? After allowing just enough time for the food to really settle, it was time for some Cold Stone, my absolute favorite ice cream place. It's been a little over a year since I had my first taste of that gourmet ice cream down in Arizona, but it's still a vivid memory - especially the part after the ice cream when I just sprawled myself out on the bed and couldn't move because I actually finished a big bowl of it. My best friend always sticks to the same flavor and mix-in, while I try to branch out and try a new flavor every time. There have been a few times I've wished I stuck to the same like her and the other night was one of them. My ice cream was delicious, don't get me wrong, but nothing really tops cake batter-flavored ice cream and cookie dough chunks.

After shooting some hoops at the church's Friday night high school event (wonder if they could tell we weren't in high school), we randomly stopped by the house of a few guys we know. Very randomly. Not long after we'd rang the doorbell and thrown a few pebbles at the window, a car full of guys pulled up. And I mean full of guys. I don't think I've ever seen five guys pile out of a Lexus before. But there they were . . and there we were . . and it was a little bit awkward. I'm not in the habit of interrupting a guys' night out, so I felt a little bad. They didn't know why we were there . . and neither did we. It was just a random night. Then, they accused us of being up to something, and after we declined the invite to smoke cigars and play poker, we drove home thinking, "Hmm, we should've been up to something . . ." And I don't really remember what happened after that . . . I just know that they think we pulled some kind of prank on them that night and why would we do a thing like that?

The night ended with Scrabble under the street light. My best friend, her adorable brother, and I laid out a blanket on the grass and continued our Scrabble tradition until 2 in the morning. What a night! Great food, relaxing stroll, new songs, gourmet ice cream, a little sports, an awkward moment, and the best board game ever. I love making memories with my best friend.

Totally Embarassed

You know when something funny happens or you get nervous or embarrassed about something and someone points at you and says, "You're blushing!" and you want to slap them upside the head because your face then turns an even darker shade of red? Well . . today I was the one that realized I was blushing. Normally I can't tell that I'm blushing even when others claim I am, but today . . today I felt the blood rush and rush and rush to my cheeks . . and I don't even know why!!

I was sitting at my desk working on something when in walks Rochester. I had just happened to be thinking something about him, although I can't remember what I was thinking . . oh yeah, maybe I was thinking about how nice it was of him to buy me dinner last night. He really is such a gentleman. AG says that any good guy friend would pay, but I mean, really, how many actually do?

At any rate . . in he walks in his suit . . which he always looks so nice in . . so clean-cut and professional and ZZ Top's "Sharp-Dressed Man" starts playing in my head. . . I don't even know what he said to me . . just small-talk, you know . . but sometimes when he looks at me or smiles, I just get, I dunno, nervous or something. . it's weird, because I feel completely comfortable around him. Today, I felt like I was having hot flashes! All I could think was, "Ohmygosh, I hope he doesn't notice! I mean, I never notice when other people blush, so maybe he's not noticing that I'm blushing right now . . a lot! Guys aren't very perceptive, right? They don't pay attention to details, to small things like fire-red cheeks, do they?"

I really, really hope not.