Monday, August 15, 2005
My birthday is in two days and it's gonna be great. And the reason it's gonna be great is because I have no expectations. I've decided over the past couple of years that if you just treat your birthday like an ordinary day, it will most likely be an extra ordinary day. When you get to be my age, there really isn't a whole lot to look forward to. I mean, what happens when you turn 24 besides realizing that you're not where you thought you would be five years ago? . . not that I'm complaining, because I have a wonderful life and I'm content where I am, yet anticipating the next thing. I'm just saying that it's not like it used to be when I was younger. There was always the birthday party with all your friends, playing games, unwrapping a bunch of gifts, and having everyone make a fuss over you. But when you get older, you don't want to plan a party, because what will you do and who will come, and you don't necessarily have a group of friends anymore. Last year I had a small, random bunch of people over at the last minute and (though I was blessed that people actually showed up and friends even surprised me with a cake-very sweet of them) it was just a little weird. Everyone was gone by ten and I just sat in my room the rest of the night wondering why I even invited people over. So, I've decided that I'm not going to plan on having fun on my birthday and then when someone wishes me a "Happy Birthday" it will just be a pleasant surprise, because I won't even be thinking about it being my birthday. And if I get a gift, it, too, will be somewhat unexpected. "For me?" Besides when you get older and have a job, you don't really need anything anyway. So, I have no idea what Tuesday will be like, but I have no expectations so I'm sure it'll turn out to be a pretty nice day.